Month: May 2016

Well, our May will start to calm down some. Two college graduations and then the marriage of our oldest to the wife of his youth has filled my family with joy, love – and sheer exhaustion. A good feeling. So as I sat there watching Josh marry Chandler, there was hardly a moment when my eyes were not ready to tear, when my mouth was not brimming with a happy smile and when my heart was not overflowing with a daddy’s love and hope for his son and future daughter-in-law. Marriage can be for two perfectly suited together as Josh and Chan but marriage can help suit us perfectly for what we should be. For in that moment’s view was the amazing reality that God is the one who transforms everything around us and in us if we will but learn from Him.

Let me start with this illustration[i]. There once was a stately prince and a peasant girl who fell in love. This prince had everything in the world at his control: power, dominion, wealth and his choice of many women. He was the perfect specimen of a man that ever lived – a catch. On the other hand there was this peasant girl – an average girl at best. Her crankiness and moodiness kept her from becoming more in her life and character. To look at her from anyone else’s eyes you would never believe she was worth much. But through the prince’s eyes, she was “to die for.” The prince did not want to live without her and asked her to be His bride. The prince promised his bride that He would come back for her soon, and the peasant turned princess pledged to faithfully await his return.

More amazing than that the Prince chose the peasant girl is how the peasant girl acted after his proposal. You’d expect her to bubble over about the upcoming wedding but instead, she rarely ever mentioned it. You’d expect her every waking moment to be spent in planning the big day but instead, she invested all her time and usefulness in the mundane realities of life. And you’d expect her to be faithful but instead, you could not tell her apart from any other peasant girl flirting with other courtiers.

I know you think this is a fairy tale, but it has happened. Can you imagine? What lowly peasant girl fortunate enough to be the object of a perfect prince’s eternal love would do such a thing? Would you not expect her to be captivated by His love and filled with wonder that she was fortunate enough to be loved by Him? That’s a good question, but only we can answer it. You see, the story of the prince and His peasant bride is not a fairy tale, or some medieval fable. It isn’t a story about anyone else at all, but rather a story about us, you and me, the church. We are the ones who are “The Bride of Christ” for Paul says in Ephesians 5:32 that “this mystery is great; but I am speaking with reference to Christ and the church” (NASB). Jesus came to us as our perfect Prince and promised to be our Husband and then,  promised to return to us and take us to our home together forever.

The most powerful image of the relationship between God and humans is marriage. Even in the Old Testament, Isaiah 62:5, God speaks through the prophet, “…as a bridegroom rejoices over his bride, so will your God rejoice over you” (NASB). In Hosea 2:19-20 God promises His people, “I will betroth you to me forever; I will betroth you in righteousness and justice, in love and compassion” (NIV). It isn’t a novel description – but it is a powerful one.

In a Jewish wedding, there was an initial engagement or betrothal. Often arranged by the family of a man and woman, the couple was considered husband and wife from betrothal even though they remained apart. Then at a future date, the groom would return to claim his bride. At that time there would be a wedding feast and a formal uniting of the couple, and they would live together and begin their life as a family. During the betrothal both groom and bride were supposed to remain faithful.

In the New Testament, Paul pleads for fidelity in the church at Corinth and says, “I am jealous for you with the jealousy of God himself. For I promised you as a pure bride to one husband, Christ” (2Corinthians 11:2, NLT). In Revelation 19:6-9, John describes the return of Christ with pictures of the bridegroom coming to claim His betrothed: “Then I heard what sounded like a great multitude, like the roar of rushing waters and like loud peals of thunder, shouting: “Hallelujah! For our Lord God Almighty reigns. Let us rejoice and be glad and give him glory! For the wedding of the Lamb has come, and his bride has made herself ready…” (NIV)

These powerful images remind me of the perfect view at a wedding. It is not the front row although I loved being that close. It isn’t in the middle to see the expanse of the wedding party. It is seeing what God has done in this masterful thing called marriage – a life altering and soul enhancing relationship to connect each spouse to the knowledge of God’s relationship with us with just how deeply He loves us, and how intimately He wants to relate to us. This is no “one night stand” that God calls us to, but a “lifetime” of covenant life in growing closer to Him.

Then, when you return to the story I began with – the church as the peasant bride and Christ as the perfect Prince – we come to some key points that secure this view to keep our eyes on Jesus.

Christ chose us. In Jewish culture where the bride is chosen for you, you would hope she would be pretty, kind and honest – and in my personal case – a good cook. It certainly can be said that the Father chose Christ for us. But that means that the Father chose a cast of motley humanity full of sinners, liars, and cheaters and said to His Son, they are yours. Imagine if your dad brought a bride like that to you, what would you do?  And then the story gets better, the Perfect Prince still chose the peasant bride. He chose us while we were sinners. He loved us what we were unfaithful.  He came to us though our garments were soiled and our faces ruined from the sin of our lives and He said, “will you marry me?”

Christ loves us. Christ has fallen “head over heels” in love. Only love would lead one to be crucified his His bride: nails driven in His wrists and feet and a crown of thorns wedged into His head. Only love would do that. And the peasant bride, still unworthy of such a love, is easily likened to Isaiah’s description of sinners as those in whom “all our righteous acts are like filthy rags” (64:6, NASB). If it depended on us, there would be no wedding. But Jesus couldn’t bear to spend eternity without us. So with His blood he clothed us for our wedding. Isaiah 61:10 says, “I delight greatly in the Lord; my soul rejoices in my God. For he has clothed me with garments of salvation and arrayed me in a robe of righteousness, as a bridegroom adorns his head like a priest, and as a bride adorns herself with her jewels” (NLT).

Christ is coming back. Now I have to tell you, given who we are and the way we sometimes behave, I can’t imagine why the perfect prince would want us as His bride. Christians are far from perfect. We are sometimes cranky and cantankerous. We fail to live up to our God given responsibilities. There are times when our faithfulness wears pretty thin, and our eyes wander. Sometimes our hearts get side-tracked and we let things like material possessions and power and prestige become more important in our lives than the bridegroom who loves us more than life itself. But He will return for us.  Jesus said “if it were not so I would have told you” (John 14:1-3). And Peter says, “Since everything will be destroyed in this way, what kind of people ought you to be? You ought to live holy and godly lives as you look forward to the day of God and speed its coming… So then, dear friends, since you are looking forward to this, make every effort to be found spotless, blameless and at peace with him” (2Peter 3:11-14, NIV).

Jesus is the Perfect Prince. And He has chose you and me as His peasant bride. So what are you doing to be prepared for the One who chose you, loves you, and is coming back to take you Home?

 

[i] from Max Lucado’s book When Christ Comes.

 

Memories can be either good or bad but they will come to us and to our children.  Lactantius said, “Memory tempers prosperity, mitigates adversity, controls youth and delights old age.”  So what kind of memories will those of us who are parents create for our children?

“My parents had great faith in God and in God’s word.”

The number of times children see parents bow their heads and open their Bibles will pay dividends no bank could every measure.  Of course, it’s not about our agenda or doing it for publicity but rather, it is about our custom.  Do we bother to pray or are we bothered to do it?  Do we have the mind to seek God’s counsel or do we have to be reminded constantly to seek it?  Memories can be fabricated.  But lasting memories are rarely scripted. We need to be reminded that what our children see at home is what they remember most. And may it be that they see that we have real faith in God and His word.

“My parents were passionate about worship.”

When there is no good reason for our absences, children know it.  Or if we make no sacrifice to attend worship, children know it. Recently, a dad told me about talking with his son about weekend activities that might infringe on Sunday worship and the son interrupted, “I don’t want to do it if I have to miss church.”  That son so spoke because of what parents had already modelled for him in their own passion to worship above everything else – not because he knew church dogma.  Regularly letting our children miss for anything from sports to schoolwork only creates the memory that other things really are more important than the passion to worship.  We need to be sure that what our children learn at home is that we are passionate about worship.

“My parents were godly about their morals.”

When children grow up, they learn morals from their parents. That does not mean children will never sin. But, parents should remember that if we do not teach our children to love God and to live by His standards, the world will teach them to do the very opposite. Kids need to learn at home that virginity is a virtue – not an oddity. They need to learn that the “marriage bed is to be undefiled” (Hebrews 13:5) and consequently, infidelity in a marriage is condemned as well as living together without marriage. Just recently a young man told me he broke up with his girlfriend because she “cheated on him” when he was away.  He wanted a person committed to godly morals. And that for him began at home. We need to be sure that real morals begin at home.

“My parents were compassionate and kind.”

Like the ones listed above, these are all observable.  As Paul wrote, “If I speak… but have not love, I become a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal” (1Corinthians 13:1).  This love propels our behavior in an observably right direction.  When my children smack their gum, why am I surprised since I do too?  If my children have no compassion or kindness with others, _______ we know the rest. We need to be sure that what our children learn at home is that we are compassionate and kind to everyone – whether the person is the lovable or the unlovable.

Only Jesus, of course, was perfect in all this.  I know I am not.  But He left an example that we should try every day to follow.  It will only make us happier and make our children happier as we build beautiful memories for them by really and simply — following Him.

And “don’t sin by letting anger control you.” Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry, for anger gives a foothold to the devil.  Ephesians 4:26-27, NLT

What makes you mad? In an article about 20 years ago called, “The New Angries,” Mr. Maddocks wrote: “Everybody—and I do mean everybody—is mad and simply won’t take it anymore, least of all from one another.” He adds, “If the ‘90s became the decade of anger, as the ’80s became the decade of greed, it will not be because of violent and visible militants. It will be because of the New Angries.” Maddocks goes on to explain that these are people who equate anger with honesty, and they see a full and free expression of wrath as the means to mental and physical health.

You mean people are angry? Don’t you just have to scan your facebook feed? Everything from traffic jams to interpersonal conflicts and now very current is the political race for the presidency of the USA is self evident – and it is an unhealthy trend because anger can be destructive—to health, relationships, and institutions.

Of course not all anger is wrong. The Bible says, “Don’t sin by letting anger control you,” and Jesus expressed anger at the hypocritical Pharisees and the moneychangers in the Temple. The issue is what makes us mad? Clearly there is a place for what we call “righteous indignation.” We should be angry about sin and injustice in the world. Anger should motivate us to righteous action, to make things right, rather than self-righteousness or unrighteousness.

But too often, we lose our temper over things that are small, insignificant, and inconsequential: traffic, slow-moving check-out lines, trampled grass, noisy children, poor service.

What makes you mad? Don’t waste your energy yelling and honking your horn at the guy who just cut you off. Rather, focus your emotions and time on what is truly important because anger can be a destructive fire.

Paul said, “For as long as it depends on you, live at peace with men.” And, ask God to help you control your temper SO THAT you can exercise love instead.

“Thy rod and thy staff they comfort me” (Psalm 23:4).

Many aging people know well the advantage of a walking stick. Many people have fond recollections of the heirloom quality canes that have passed generations. Just the glance of one with its knobby handle in your hand gives the heart a tug of comfort when your legs need support.

Sometimes the simple and graceful word can lift one’s heart from fear of dangers with verses like Psalm 112:17 that still speaks, The one who trusts in the Lord “will not fear evil tidings; His heart is steadfast, trusting in the LORD.” In essence, God’s words become a staff to walk through the many dark days because of the heart’s confidence in the One who promises.

When death took children from my wife and me, it left us almost heartbroken. But again, anther word because another staff: “Weeping may last for the night, But a shout of joy comes in the morning” (Psalm 30:5). Feeble we felt. And our walk was more of a hobble in those days. But when those words reached our hearts, it became a rod and staff to comfort us.

In times of special danger or doubt, faith in the Shepherd of our souls make Scripture the rod of our hearts to guide us through the maze we have ahead – every day.

So open your Book today and read. It will be a light shining in a dark place if you will let it shine.